Thursday, January 19, 2012

More Fishducky Funnies

OK, so I published this one by mistake. It wasn't quite done yet. There was a picture of the VW bus, but it was so small, I was going to ask Fran to send it as an .jpg attachment in email. Oh, well. Here is one of Fishducky's funny stories that I thought would be a nice antidote after yesterday's post.

But first: Thank you for your concerned comments regarding that post. I have to assure you that I have never been afraid here, now I am concerned. I just want to know what's going on, so more a concern about the unknown. And, of course, I do listen to my dogs. Angel and Bandit saved me from an intruder who jumped our seven-foot fence in Los Angeles at a time I didn't have a lock on my back door. I said to the guy from my bathroom window, "if you don't leave, I'll let my four dogs loose on you," (I only had two, but they sounded like four) and I never saw someone climb back over a tall fence that fast. I do have some dog stories to tell, but now I should give the word to my friend Fishducky:

I love to drive! My first Mustang, which I think was a ’69, was the first car I had which my husband hadn’t driven for years prior to my driving it. It was also the first car I had which (deliberately) could not hold a troop of Boy or Girl Scouts. The government had a ban on manufacturing convertibles at that time because of safety concerns. There were, however, no laws about making your own convertibles. We had the car decapitated & a convertible top put on! Once I was driving about 4:00am on a virtually deserted freeway when I glanced at my speedometer. I was going 105! I reluctantly slowed down.

Here's a picture of our 1970 Mustang. We got it from my friend Lin, who once raced Steve McQueen down a Hollywood street in this very car. And lived to tell the tale. I can attest to the fun of driving these old Mustangs with their powerful engines. Fishducky: Hope this makes up for my clicking Publish too soon. Can you, BTW cancel a post if you post it by mistake? I have no time now to find out -- I'm off to town again!

My husband, Bud, drives slightly differently. I have accused him of being a graduate of the HELEN KELLER SCHOOL OF DRIVING. He is apparently more comfortable driving by Braille, because he is constantly on the Bott’s dots (the little reflective markers used to separate lanes) so he can feel his way along the road. He used to travel. When he was out of town, I would sometimes drive over the dots so I could pretend he was still home.
I could never understand why men doubt women’s ability to drive. Once, when I was backing out of a parking space at Sears, a very SIMPLE thing to do, I noticed a man standing behind me, directing me & waving me on. He said, “Plenty of room, lady!” I wanted to kill him! If I had, I’m sure a jury (of women) would have found sufficient cause to set me free.
Another example: I drove through a very narrow, twisty entryway into a crowded parking lot. The attendant told me they were full. I asked him if there was someplace I could turn around & he told me there wasn’t—I would have to back out the way I came in. I told him OK & put the car in reverse. He started to give me a lesson on how to back my car out. I leaned out the window & said, “No problem—I used to drive race cars for a living!” A total lie, but who cares?
Around 1975 we bought a condo on Maui. A client of Bud’s gave us an old VW bus & had it shipped over. My kids & I brush painted it Yellow Cab yellow & covered it with cartoon drawings. (How often do kids get to paint pictures on a car WITH the owner’s permission?) On the front it said, “Holo holo duck” (wandering around duck) & had my fishducky picture on it. I was taking the kids from Kaanapali to Lahaina one day & stopped at a hotel to pick up a friend. A lady approached & asked if this bus goes
to Lahaina. I told her it did. She asked the cost & I told her it was a free shuttle. I drove her to Lahaina. She may still be there waiting for a ride back. If you see her, tell her we went out of business.


Related Posts with Thumbnails