Friday, April 1, 2016

A is for April

Me, alone. Life after loss.

April hath put a spirit of youth in everything. ~ William Shakespeare

April was always my favorite month. In Sweden, little delicate flowers begin to raise their heads along the ditches; here in the California mountains, colorful poppies and other wildflowers bring delight.

Then last April, you died and April became the cruellest month for me. I should have known, but I didn't. I thought you would come home to me, so I could take care of you.

Now almost a year has gone by, the earth is coming alive again with flowers and bees and butterflies. I am beginning to heal, time does that for you. Friends, family, and new experiences begin to fill the void in the fabric of my life. 

My husband's name was Errol. He died last April from sepsis, a vicious infection he got while in the hospital. He had Hepatitis C and liver cancer, but was cured from the Hepatitis C. The cancer returned, a stent was needed, a probe was sent into him, infection ensued. He spent over two months in ICU; he had a liver transplant and seven surgeries before he passed away of multiple organ failure. 

I decided to do the A to Z once again to document my journey toward a good life for me, letting the sadness in, but focusing on the joy of being alive, feeling well, and moving toward happiness.


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